Four Inch House

 

How to tell you’re OLD:

When they light all the candles on your birthday cake, the smoke alarm goes off.

You started out with nothing in life, and you realize you have most of it left.

When you take a bite of steak, your teeth might stay there.

Your back goes out more often than you do.

If a storm’s coming, you know before the weatherman does.

There’s Metamucil and Preparation H in your medicine cabinet, but not Bengay.

When invited to two events the same night, you pick the one that gets you home earlier.

Your idea of “happy hour” is a good nap.

It takes you twice as long to look half as good.

You can remember your kindergarten teacher’s name, but not why you walked into the kitchen.

The policeman who just pulled you over looks like a teenager.

You hear “snap, crackle and pop” at the breakfast table, but you’re not eating cereal.

Tiny Monkey Wrench

 

Today is National Buttermilk Biscuit Day. Homemade buttermilk biscuits are great with sausage and gravy, butter and jam, with meat and cheese, with strawberries and whipped cream, or all by themselves.

 

Buttermilk Biscuits

 

2 cups flour

2 teaspoons baking powder

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

1 teaspoon salt

7 tablespoons cold unsalted butter, cut into thin slices

3/4 cup cold buttermilk

 

Preheat oven to 425F and line baking sheet with parchment or silicone. In a large bowl, whisk together all ingredients. Cut in butter until it’s crumbly. Make a well in the center; pour in buttermilk and stir until combined. Turn dough onto floured surface. Pat into a rectangle, then fold into thirds. Repeat twice. Roll dough to 1/2 inch thick; cut with a biscuit cutter. Place on baking sheet with sides ALMOST touching. Bake 15 minutes. Serve warm with your favorite sweet or savory accompaniment.

Rolling Stone

 

I voted for Mitt Romney in 2012. I saw what a marvelous job he did with the 2002 Winter Olympics, and thought his skills would make him an excellent president. I was thrilled to vote for someone with beliefs similar to my own. Romney didn’t win, but I was proud of the man who did, and of the country that elected him. In 2016, I voted for a former first lady. I felt she was the driving force behind her husband’s presidency, and I looked forward to seeing a woman holding the highest office in the land. She didn’t win, either. In 2020 the man I voted for won, but he didn’t accomplish much. Maybe we should stop electing presidents who are well past retirement age. In 2024, I voted for a woman who wasn’t a convicted felon, who wouldn’t have paved over the rose garden or destroyed the east wing, insulted our allies, painted the reflecting pool, started a stupid war or put her name and face on EVERYTHING.

Little Girl

Humans are amazing.

Usain Bolt is considered the fastest person after running 100 meters in 9.58 seconds.

Sultan Kösen is the tallest living man in the world, standing at 8’ 3”.

The world’s shortest adult is Jyoti Amge, who is 2’ 1” tall.

Jeanne Calment, a Frenchwoman, is believed to be the world’s oldest human. If she’s still here next February, she’ll be 123.

British savant Daniel Tammet can recite pi to over 22,000 digits, and can learn new languages in a week.

Ben Underwood lost his sight as a toddler. He developed his own form of echolocation and could play basketball with remarkable accuracy.

James Harrison’s blood had unusually strong antibodies against the D Rh antigen. His blood and plasma donations saved more than 2,000 babies.

Sheetal Devi was born in India in 2007, without arms. She shoots a bow and arrow with her feet and has won multiple international medals for archery.

Plus One More

 

“I recall one home evening when my mother bore powerful testimony of the law of tithing. My parents immigrated to the United States through a job offer that allowed us to receive legal residency. However, we experienced financial setbacks, as many immigrants do as they become acclimated to a new country and economy. With a gaze of her certain witness, she said, ‘All we need to see is the very hand of Jehovah Himself to have any greater assurance He is blessing us by our payment of tithing.’ I am certain the payment of tithes and offerings will enhance our spiritual capacity as we put God first and offer our firstlings of the flock. I witness a spiritual power and direction, heretofore unknown, will come into our lives as we keep the law of obedience and sacrifice.” – Elder Jorge T. Becerra

Old Windmill

 

“If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?” — Milton Berle

“All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.” — Abraham Lincoln

“The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness.” — Honoré de Balzac

“God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers.” — Rudyard Kipling

“Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.” — P.J. O’Rourke

“A mother’s arms are made of tenderness, and children sleep soundly in them.” — Victor Hugo

“Motherhood is the greatest thing and the hardest thing.” — Ricki Lake

“Motherhood: All love begins and ends there.” — Robert Browning

“Some are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same, and most mothers kiss and scold together.” — Pearl S. Buck

“My mother had a large heart — so large everybody’s joys found welcome in it, and hospitable accommodation.” — Mark Twain

Patchwork Star

 

According to legend, Pete MacIntyre was called Whiskey Pete because he used bootlegging to supplement income from his gas station on the Nevada/California border. Pete died in 1933 and was buried in an unmarked grave. He was accidentally disinterred decades later, during construction on a bridge between his hotel/casino on the west side of I-15 and Buffalo Bill’s on the east. We frequently stopped in Primm for gas while driving to Disneyland and back. We only stayed there once. Knowing how exhausted we are when returning from the happiest place, we booked a room in Primm. An accident turned the freeway into a parking lot. We arrived hours late and they’d sold our room. We stayed in room that was still under construction, which was a unique experience. Whiskey Pete’s was closed in 2024, and Buffalo Bill’s will be gone by Independence Day, along with the restaurants and gas stations. Before you know it, Primm will be a ghost town.