Cupcake

 

Tomorrow is my birthday. It isn’t a scary one with a zero at the end, but still. I’d be upset if anyone referred to me as “elderly,” but I can no longer legitimately call myself “middle-aged.” If anyone asks my age, I plan to say I’m “well-seasoned.”

"At age 20, we worry what others think of us. At age 40, we don't care what they think of us. At age 60, we discover they haven't been thinking of us at all." – Ann Landers

"Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere." – George Burns

"Age is simply the number of years the world has been enjoying you!" – Source Unknown

"Life would be infinitely happier if we could be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen." – Mark Twain

“Getting old is like climbing a mountain; you get a little out of breath, but the view is much better!” – Ingrid Bergman

Striped Strawberry

 

The vending machine was invented in Ancient Egypt, by a Greek mathematician/engineer. It was designed to dispense holy water inside Egyptian temples. In the 1600’s, small machines in English pubs exchanged tobacco for coins. The country best known for its love of vending machines is Japan, which boasts a machine for every 23 people. Japanese buy hot and cold beverages from vending machines; sometimes both are available from the same unit. They can purchase hot foods like burgers, soba noodles, and curry; refrigerated items like sweet potatoes, sushi and bananas; or frozen treats like mochi, ice cream or popsicles. Their use isn’t limited to food and beverages. In airports, train stations and hotels, vending machines sell face masks, hand sanitizer, and toothbrush/toothpaste kits. And in business districts, there are machines offering socks, neckties, dress shirts and deodorant. There are even solar-powered or hand-crank vending machines for use when the power goes out.

Duck and Ducklings

 

I found this recipe while searching for a side dish to go with our Sunday dinner of chicken kebabs. But the rule of thumb for Sundays here is, “Keep it simple, stupid.” And two dishes – the kebabs and a layered salad – were already on the labor-intensive side. So, I opted for a Caesar salad and veggies with ranch dressing instead. I'll save this for a weeknight instead.

 

Garlic Butter Rice Pilaf

 

1 cup jasmine rice

2 cups chicken broth

2 tablespoons butter

1 tablespoon olive oil

4 cloves garlic, minced

1/2 teaspoon dried thyme

2 tablespoons fresh parsley, chopped

 

Rinse rice in a mesh sieve until the water runs clear; drain. Place rice, broth, butter, oil, garlic and thyme in rice cooker. Close and set to “white rice.” When cooker has finished, transfer to serving bowl and garnish with fresh parsley. Serves four.

Hit or Miss

 

Here are a few weird but fun facts to ponder:

The Eiffel Tower can be up to six inches taller in summer, as heat makes the iron expand.

The Philippines consists of 7,641 islands, not counting sandbars that emerge during low tide.

Barbie’s full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts, and she’s from Willows, Wisconsin.

When lightning strikes sand, the heat can create glass structures called fulgurite.

Your circulatory system – veins, arteries and capillaries – is more than 60,000 miles long.

71% of Earth is covered with water, but only 2.5% of that is fresh water. And only 1% of that is accessible, with the rest bound in glaciers and polar ice caps.

Beavers have transparent third eyelids that let them see underwater while protecting their eyes.

There are more pyramids in Sudan than in Egypt, with roughly 250 compared to about 100.

Dead skin cells are a major ingredient in household dust. We shed around 200 million per hour.

Orange House

 

I was ten or eleven when I read Hey, What's Wrong with This One? by Maia Wojciechowska. A lot of years have gone by and I’ve read hundreds of books since then, but this one has stuck with me. It’s about three brothers – Harley, Davidson and Mott – trying to cope with their mother’s absence. One thing they learn is casseroles are good things: easy on the cook and on the dishwasher. Some, like this one, can be comfort food, too.

 

Neiman Marcus Chicken Casserole

 

4 cups cooked shredded chicken

1 can cream of chicken soup

1 cup sour cream

2 cups shredded cheddar

3 green onions, chopped

1/2 cup bacon crumbles

1 teaspoon Cholula

1 sleeve Ritz crackers, crushed

1/2 cup butter, melted

 

Preheat oven to 375F. Coat 9x13” pan with cooking spray. Add first 7 ingredients to pan; stir. In a small bowl, mix together crackers and butter; sprinkle over casserole. Bake 35 minutes.

Flower Show

 

“Do you remember learning about Jesus feeding more than 5,000 people? Jesus had been teaching people all day, and they were hungry. Somewhere in this large group there was a young boy who had five loaves of bread and two small fishes. He knew that this food could not feed very many people, but he decided to give Jesus what he had. Jesus took the food and thanked Heavenly Father for it. That food fed thousands of people! Just as the young boy did not have to figure out how a small amount of bread and fish could feed so many people, you do not need to worry about fixing all the problems around you. Heavenly Father can provide miracles when you simply offer what you have. When you say, ‘Here am I, send me,’ Heavenly Father can take something small and simple and make it great!” – President Susan H. Porter

Forty-Eight Louisiana Blocks

 

I did an inventory in my sewing room this week, and discovered I have seventeen different sets of quilt blocks that are ready for sashing and/or borders. Seventeen. That doesn’t count the tops that are ready to be quilted or the quilts that are waiting to be bound. It’s just blocks. Some are in plastic bins and some are in cardboard boxes. Some are in zipper bags and some in paper grocery sacks. Seventeen is just too many, so I set to work on clearing the backlog. I made the first of these red, cream and blue blocks in November 2022. I didn’t follow a pattern. I was just using up leftover scraps from other projects. If I stitch these blocks together without sashing, add a 2” blue stop border and a 4” red outer border, it would make an excellent donation to Quilts of Valor. One down, sixteen to go.

Midnight Blue Pinwheel

 

We went to a potluck picnic last night, and had a marvelous time. I brought my spicy English layer salad. If you’re interested, the recipe is here: https://mombowe.blogspot.com/2016/06/four-teacups.html

It’s one of my favorite dishes, but it can be a bit of work. I really should have made grape jelly meatballs. There are only three ingredients; no slicing, grating, chopping, or julienning. (I looked it up. That really is a word.) In a slow cooker, dump ten ounces of grape jelly. (Smuckers is okay, Bonne Maman is amazing, but usually I just use my own.) Add 12 ounces of Heinz chili sauce and stir. (There are other brands, but they might change the taste.) Add 32 ounces of fully cooked, frozen meatballs. (You could make your own, but that’s extra work.) Cover and cook 3 hours on high or 6 hours on low. If you take this to a potluck, be sure to bring toothpicks for serving.

Brimming Basket

 

I learned a new term (well, new to me) this month: Maycember. If it isn’t obvious, Maycember is a combination of May and December. It refers to the absolute mayhem that happens at the end of every school year. This time of year, calendars are just as jam-packed as they are during the holiday season, without the benefit of gift-giving, festive decorations, or the cultural permission to slow down. So far, we’ve had two school band concerts, a choir concert, a piano recital, a dance recital, an amusement park field trip, two fund-raising carnivals, and several end-of-year farewell parties. As if that wasn’t bad enough, some of these events occur at the same time on the same day, so there’s literally no way to attend them all. The good news is summer break starts a week from tomorrow. Then there’s a whole week of relative peace and quiet before the summer musical starts.

Pink Tulip

 

For years I was a substitute teacher. It was a great way to supplement our family’s income and still be at home when my kids were. I only subbed in elementary schools, as older kids can be brutal.  When I found this story, I could definitely relate: “A former Marine Corps sergeant took a job as high school teacher. Before the school year started, he injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast under his shirt. The students didn’t know. The first day, he walked into the rowdiest class in the school—the kind that eats new teachers alive. The kids, knowing he was a former Marine, were eager to test him. The sergeant opened a window and sat at his desk. When a breeze blew his tie around, he casually picked up a stapler and stapled the tie to his chest. The room went silent. The rest of the year, discipline was not an issue.”

Half a Dozen Kitty Cats

 

The other day, a friend-of-a-friend on Facebook posed a question: If given the opportunity to forever be an age you choose (not a time, but a physical age), what age would you choose, and why? There were thousands of answers. Apparently, this is a subject we all have opinions about. A lot of men thought seventeen was the perfect age, because that’s when they’d earned their driver’s licenses. Several women chose 21, because they’d felt the most attractive at that age. Older people were more likely to select forties or fifties, when their health was better than today. Not me. If given the choice, I’d be ten forever. When I was ten, I could ride a bike, run like the wind, do cartwheels, and pull myself into a handstand. I ate whatever I liked without consequences. I didn’t pay taxes, didn’t have a mortgage, and no one could make me do anything I didn’t want to do: the perfect age.

Center of Attention

 

“As prophets have taught many times in the past, you may not feel like praying or you may not know what to say, but God hears the secret prayers of your heart. The feelings of your heart and the love for our Heavenly Father and for His Beloved Son can be so constant that your prayers will ascend always. As we pray continually, no matter the circumstances of life, the Lord will offer us His peace and abiding support. I am reminded of the example of the sons of Mosiah, who had success in preaching the gospel and were made spiritually strong because they prayed constantly. We read in the book of Alma, ‘They had given themselves to much prayer, and fasting; therefore they had the spirit of prophecy, and the spirit of revelation.’ It is significant that their spiritual strength came from continued prayer rather than waiting to pray until a moment of crisis when they desperately needed divine help.” – President Henry B. Eyring

Four Inch House

 

How to tell you’re OLD:

When they light all the candles on your birthday cake, the smoke alarm goes off.

You started out with nothing in life, and you realize you have most of it left.

When you take a bite of steak, your teeth might stay there.

Your back goes out more often than you do.

If a storm’s coming, you know before the weatherman does.

There’s Metamucil and Preparation H in your medicine cabinet, but not Bengay.

When invited to two events the same night, you pick the one that gets you home earlier.

Your idea of “happy hour” is a good nap.

It takes you twice as long to look half as good.

You can remember your kindergarten teacher’s name, but not why you walked into the kitchen.

The policeman who just pulled you over looks like a teenager.

You hear “snap, crackle and pop” at the breakfast table, but you’re not eating cereal.

Tiny Monkey Wrench

 

Today is National Buttermilk Biscuit Day. Homemade buttermilk biscuits are great with sausage and gravy, butter and jam, with meat and cheese, with strawberries and whipped cream, or all by themselves.

 

Buttermilk Biscuits

 

2 cups flour

2 teaspoons baking powder

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

1 teaspoon salt

7 tablespoons cold unsalted butter, cut into thin slices

3/4 cup cold buttermilk

 

Preheat oven to 425F and line baking sheet with parchment or silicone. In a large bowl, whisk together all ingredients. Cut in butter until it’s crumbly. Make a well in the center; pour in buttermilk and stir until combined. Turn dough onto floured surface. Pat into a rectangle, then fold into thirds. Repeat twice. Roll dough to 1/2 inch thick; cut with a biscuit cutter. Place on baking sheet with sides ALMOST touching. Bake 15 minutes. Serve warm with your favorite sweet or savory accompaniment.

Rolling Stone

 

I voted for Mitt Romney in 2012. I saw what a marvelous job he did with the 2002 Winter Olympics, and thought his skills would make him an excellent president. I was thrilled to vote for someone with beliefs similar to my own. Romney didn’t win, but I was proud of the man who did, and of the country that elected him. In 2016, I voted for a former first lady. I felt she was the driving force behind her husband’s presidency, and I looked forward to seeing a woman holding the highest office in the land. She didn’t win, either. In 2020 the man I voted for won, but he didn’t accomplish much. Maybe we should stop electing presidents who are well past retirement age. In 2024, I voted for a woman who wasn’t a convicted felon, who wouldn’t have paved over the rose garden or destroyed the east wing, insulted our allies, painted the reflecting pool, started a stupid war or put her name and face on EVERYTHING.

Little Girl

Humans are amazing.

Usain Bolt is considered the fastest person after running 100 meters in 9.58 seconds.

Sultan Kösen is the tallest living man in the world, standing at 8’ 3”.

The world’s shortest adult is Jyoti Amge, who is 2’ 1” tall.

Jeanne Calment, a Frenchwoman, is believed to be the world’s oldest human. If she’s still here next February, she’ll be 123.

British savant Daniel Tammet can recite pi to over 22,000 digits, and can learn new languages in a week.

Ben Underwood lost his sight as a toddler. He developed his own form of echolocation and could play basketball with remarkable accuracy.

James Harrison’s blood had unusually strong antibodies against the D Rh antigen. His blood and plasma donations saved more than 2,000 babies.

Sheetal Devi was born in India in 2007, without arms. She shoots a bow and arrow with her feet and has won multiple international medals for archery.

Plus One More

 

“I recall one home evening when my mother bore powerful testimony of the law of tithing. My parents immigrated to the United States through a job offer that allowed us to receive legal residency. However, we experienced financial setbacks, as many immigrants do as they become acclimated to a new country and economy. With a gaze of her certain witness, she said, ‘All we need to see is the very hand of Jehovah Himself to have any greater assurance He is blessing us by our payment of tithing.’ I am certain the payment of tithes and offerings will enhance our spiritual capacity as we put God first and offer our firstlings of the flock. I witness a spiritual power and direction, heretofore unknown, will come into our lives as we keep the law of obedience and sacrifice.” – Elder Jorge T. Becerra

Old Windmill

 

“If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?” — Milton Berle

“All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.” — Abraham Lincoln

“The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness.” — Honoré de Balzac

“God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers.” — Rudyard Kipling

“Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.” — P.J. O’Rourke

“A mother’s arms are made of tenderness, and children sleep soundly in them.” — Victor Hugo

“Motherhood is the greatest thing and the hardest thing.” — Ricki Lake

“Motherhood: All love begins and ends there.” — Robert Browning

“Some are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same, and most mothers kiss and scold together.” — Pearl S. Buck

“My mother had a large heart — so large everybody’s joys found welcome in it, and hospitable accommodation.” — Mark Twain

Patchwork Star

 

According to legend, Pete MacIntyre was called Whiskey Pete because he used bootlegging to supplement income from his gas station on the Nevada/California border. Pete died in 1933 and was buried in an unmarked grave. He was accidentally disinterred decades later, during construction on a bridge between his hotel/casino on the west side of I-15 and Buffalo Bill’s on the east. We frequently stopped in Primm for gas while driving to Disneyland and back. We only stayed there once. Knowing how exhausted we are when returning from the happiest place, we booked a room in Primm. An accident turned the freeway into a parking lot. We arrived hours late and they’d sold our room. We stayed in room that was still under construction, which was a unique experience. Whiskey Pete’s was closed in 2024, and Buffalo Bill’s will be gone by Independence Day, along with the restaurants and gas stations. Before you know it, Primm will be a ghost town.

Tiny Teal Flower

 

Slow Cooker Greek Pork

 

2 pork tenderloins (about 2 pounds)

1 teaspoon kosher salt

1 cup plain Greek yogurt

2-4 garlic cloves, crushed

1 large lemon, zested and juiced

 

Coat slow cooker pot with cooking spray. Rub pork with salt and place in pot. Combine remaining ingredients in bowl. Spoon 1/2 of the yogurt mixture over pork. Cover and refrigerate remaining yogurt mixture. Cover and cook pork on high 4 to 5 hours, or on low 6 to 7. (We did low for 6 hours, but it could have cooked a bit longer.) Remove pork and shred with 2 forks, then return to pot. Stir in reserved yogurt mixture; cover and rewarm at least ten minutes. Great with rice or warm pitas. We had ours with lettuce, tomato, cucumbers, kalamata olives, tzatziki sauce, and feta. This recipe feeds six, so of course we cut it in half.

Five Kitty Cats

 

I’ve done it without giving it a second thought. You probably have, too. I’ve eaten an apple while in a moving car. When I was done, I’ve opened the window and tossed the core out. But disposing of an apple core along a roadside isn’t as harmless as it seems. To decompose, such things need moisture and the right microorganisms, which can be in short supply along highways. Instead of becoming compost, the core will likely dehydrate. It could end up being there a long time. Meanwhile, it could entice wildlife like deer or raccoons to venture out of their comfort zone, where they may become roadkill. It could pick up roadside toxins before being snagged by a squirrel. Even without added pollutants, an apple core may not be part of a healthy diet for whatever finds it. You’re far better off keeping a trash receptacle in your car and never toss ANYTHING out the window.

Now You're Cooking

 

Next week I’ll make some loaves of banana bread for a church bake sale. I was thinking about what I need to have on hand (fresh buttermilk, whole nutmeg, and plenty of very ripe bananas) and it occurred to me this trick I’ve used for years might be useful for someone else. If I’m following a recipe I don’t have in my head – something I don’t make very often, or one I’ve never tried before – I suspend it from my cupboard door with a skirt hanger. I use a hanger with clips, not the kind that clamps the skirt between wooden slats. It puts the recipe at eye level, or at least closer to eye level than the counter. The recipe (in this case, the cookbook) is less likely to be splashed by energetic stirring or soiled by a messy countertop. Best of all, it takes up zero valuable counter space.

Striped Heart

 

This recipe serves six. Since there are only three of us, I cut it in half to make it last week. Although the original recipe called for serving this on top of cooked spaghetti, we had ours over baked potatoes. It was a big hit.

 

Slow Cooker Bacon Ranch Chicken

 

1 pound chicken breasts

6 slices bacon, cooked and crumbled

3 cloves garlic, crushed

1 package ranch dressing mix

1 can condensed cream of chicken soup

1 cup sour cream

1/2 teaspoon pepper

1/2 cup water

 

Coat the inside of a 4-quart slow cooker (Ours holds 2 1/2 quarts) with cooking spray. Place chicken in bottom, then dump remaining ingredients on top. Cover and cook on low for 6 hours, or on high for 3 to 4 hours. Remove and shred meat; return to cooker about half an hour before serving.