Old Maid's Ramble

ASDA was the first British store we visited 7+ years ago. It was Mothering Sunday and we were on our way to meet our new ward. We discovered too late we hadn’t packed a necktie. Deciding it would be worse to show up without one (first impressions being what they are) than to shop on the Sabbath, we picked up a blue rep tie with stripes heading down from east to west (the opposite of John’s American ties). Later we found stores we liked better: Morrisons, Sainsburys and Waitrose. But ASDA is still the only place we ever found pants in Heather’s size. I don’t believe we ever shopped there without meeting someone with a walker or a wheelchair. It doesn’t surprise me that an ASDA in Manchester is setting aside an hour each week to silence TVs and Musak for the benefit of customers who deal with autism and other disabilities. Let’s hope more businesses follow their lead.

Grandma's Dishes

I’ve dipped my feet in the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans, the Caribbean, the North Sea, the Irish Sea, and the Baltic. I’ve played in orchestras and rock bands. I’ve been more tempted to skip school as a teacher than as a student. I’ve owned cats, dogs, lizards, turtles, birds, fish and hedgehogs. I’ve ridden a horse, a pony, a cow and even an elephant – bareback. I’ve been to Anaheim, Orlando, Las Vegas and NYC. I’ve visited Canada, Mexico, and several countries in Europe. I’ve traveled in an ambulance and on a cruise ship. I’ve gone camping in a tent (so I never have to do THAT again). I’ve eaten snails, and I’ve liked them. I’ve pierced my own ears and cut my own hair; both huge mistakes. Over the years I’ve donated a LOT of blood. I’ve been misquoted by news reporters on TV and in the paper. I’ve had four children and four grandchildren. Grandchildren are WAY more fun.

Army Star

On the fourth Thursday of April more than 37 million employees at three and a half million workplaces will show up with a son or daughter in tow. It all started in 1993 as Take Your Daughter to Work Day; it was intended to empower young women and give them added insight into work world opportunities. Now it gives children of both sexes a break from school, a little one-on-one time with mom or dad, and a peek into what they do all day. For me, Take Your Kid to Work Day was every single day for what felt like ages. I spent every afternoon in Daddy’s office, doing homework, doodling on scratch paper and rereading the three books on his shelf that weren’t about analytical chemistry. (They were in German.) I don’t know how empowering the experience was, but I did learn the last thing on earth I wanted to be was a chemistry professor.

Square Star

He’s always been a night owl, and I’m up with the larks. So far we’ve been married 13,635 days. He told a lie to get me to date him, but I’ll forgive him eventually. Our first date was a trip to the skating rink, and the second was to an America concert. There are 4 1/2 years between his birth date and mine. He’s the older one. He knows my siblings and their families pretty well, but I’ve never met his. Together we have three sons, one daughter, three grandsons and one granddaughter. Our high schools were bitter rivals, but as neither of us attended football games, we never met until long after we graduated. We’re what you’d call a traditional couple: he brings home the bacon and I fry it. I tell him I’m the smarter of the two of us. But he beats me at Words with Friends more often that I like to admit.

Four Rocky Mountain Puzzles

A year ago I shared the story about Gravity Payments, the Seattle credit card processor whose CEO decided his employees would be happier if they all earned more than $70,000 a year. Dan Price’s plan to gradually raise all their salaries to at least that amount was initially met with euphoria. In the months that followed, enthusiasm dimmed. Clients have bailed; some because they felt the ensuing media circus was “distracting,” and others fearing the firm would raise prices to meet payroll. Many of their most valuable employees are gone, too. “He gave raises to people who have the least skills,” said one, “and the ones who were taking on the most didn’t get much of a bump.” Another complained, “People who just clocked in and out were making the same as me.” Dan Price should study John Stacey Adams’ Equity Theory of Motivation. So should everyone clamoring for a higher minimum wage.

Framed Arrows

 “From the family proclamation, we learn in the premortal realm, spirit sons and daughters knew and worshipped God as their Eternal Father. In that realm, we learned about our eternal female identity. We knew that we were each a beloved daughter of heavenly parents. Our mortal journey to earth did not change those truths. We each belong to and are needed in the family of God. Earthly families all look different. And while we do the best we can to create strong traditional families, membership in the family of God is not contingent upon any kind of status—marital status, parental status, financial status, social status, or even the kind of status we post on social media.” - Carole M. Stephens, First Counselor in the Relief Society General Presidency

5" Rocky Mountain Puzzle

He patiently waited until dark, when he knew no one would be left in the building. He squeezed through the tiny opening no one else had noticed and carefully lowered himself six and a half feet to the floor. He headed directly to the six-inch drain and forced his body through the opening. He slithered 164 feet down the drain pipe toward the Pacific Ocean and freedom. Inky the octopus had been a resident patient at the National Aquarium of New Zealand for over a year, since a fisherman had caught him in a lobster pot. He’d been attacked by something with a taste for octopus, and needed time to recuperate.  But, as anyone who’s suffered through a long recovery knows, you can only look at the same four walls for so long. Eventually you’ll do anything for a change of scenery.