One Dozen Louisiana Blocks

 

What You Missed That Day You Were Absent from Fourth Grade

 

Mrs. Nelson explained how to stand still and listen

to the wind, how to find meaning in pumping gas,

how peeling potatoes can be a form of prayer. She took

questions on how not to feel lost in the dark.

After lunch she distributed worksheets

that covered ways to remember your grandfather’s

voice. Then the class discussed falling asleep

without feeling you had forgotten to do something else—

something important—and how to believe

the house you wake in is your home. This prompted

Mrs. Nelson to draw a chalkboard diagram detailing

how to chant the Psalms during cigarette breaks,

and how not to squirm for sound when your own thoughts

are all you hear; also, that you have enough.

The English lesson was that I am

is a complete sentence.

And just before the afternoon bell, she made the math equation

look easy. The one that proves that hundreds of questions,

and feeling cold, and all those nights spent looking

for whatever it was you lost, and one person

add up to something. – Brad Aaron Modlin

Center Block

 

Fellow musicians remembered hearing Wallace Henry Hartley say if he was ever on a sinking ship, he’d play “Nearer My God to Thee” or “Oh God Our Help in Ages Past.” When the Titanic sank, most people were too preoccupied to notice which tune Hartley’s band played last. Wallace’s body was one of 340 retrieved from the North Atlantic. Surprisingly, his violin was also recovered. Wallace’s body was laid to rest near the Lancashire Methodist church where his father had been choirmaster. “Nearer My God to Thee” was played at his service, and the hymn is inscribed on his headstone. The violin had been an engagement present from Wallace’s fiancée. The Titanic sank before the wedding could take place, but the violin was returned to her. It was rediscovered in an attic, cracked, water-damaged and unplayable. After years of forensic research to determine authenticity, Wallace’s violin sold at auction for £900,000 – to date the most expensive Titanic memorabilia. 

Wonky Baker's Dozen

 

“We should not assume we need to do what only the Savior can do in the miraculous process of our perfection. As Moroni concluded his record, he taught, ‘Yea, come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, … and if ye shall deny yourselves of all ungodliness, and love God with all your might, mind and strength, then is his grace sufficient for you, that by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ.’ What a comforting and powerful truth! His grace is sufficient for me. His grace is sufficient for you. His grace is sufficient for all who labor and are heavy laden. Our Heavenly Father and our Savior, Jesus Christ, love us and have graciously offered to change us and perfect us. They want to do this. It is central to Their work and glory. I testify They have power to do this as we come to Them in faith.” – Elder Paul V. Johnson

Four Corners

 

Today’s word is contronym, also known as auto-antonym or Janus word: a word with two definitions that contradict each other. If you grew up reading Amelia Bedelia, you already know one. Mrs. Rogers tells her maid, Amelia, to dust the furniture. Mrs. Rogers meant to remove the dust, while Amelia assumed she was to sprinkle dust on the furniture. Because “dust” means two opposite things, it’s a contronym. Other examples of controyms are “cleave,” which means to cling to something or cut it apart, “overlook,” which means to supervise or to forget, and “buckle,” which means to fasten together or to fall apart. If you “sanction” something, you’re granting approval or permission. But when a country imposes a sanction, it penalizes or condemns. When someone puts down a deposit and moves into an apartment, it’s said that they are “renting.” But the landlord who takes their deposit and gives them the key is also renting. Isn’t English wonderfully weird?

Nine Louisiana Blocks

 

The Mountain

 

If the mountain seems too big today

then climb a hill instead;

If morning brings you sadness

it’s okay to stay in bed.

If the day ahead feels heavy and your plans feel like a curse,

There’s no shame in rearranging,

don’t make yourself feel worse.

If a shower stings like needles

and a bath feels like you’ll drown;

If you haven’t washed your hair for days,

don’t throw away your crown!

A day is not a lifetime.

A rest is not defeat.

Don’t think of it as failure,

Just a quiet, kind retreat.

It’s okay to take a moment

From an anxious, fractured mind.

The world will not stop turning

While you get realigned!

The mountain will still be there

When you want to try again

You can climb it in your own time,

Just love yourself till then! - Laura Ding-Edwards

Corner Block

 

"Let gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel to say your nightly prayer. And let faith be the bridge you build to overcome evil and welcome good." – Maya Angelou

“Piglet noticed that even though he had a Very Small Heart, it could hold a rather large amount of Gratitude.” – A. A. Milne

"Focusing on one thing that you are grateful for increases the energy of gratitude and rises the joy inside yourself," – Oprah Winfrey

"Gratitude is the closest thing to beauty manifested in an emotion." – Mindy Kaling

"Gratitude gets us through the hard stuff. Gratitude always leaves us looking at God and away from dread." – Max Lucado

"I looked around and thought about my life. I felt grateful. I noticed every detail. That is the key to time travel. You can only move if you are actually in the moment. You have to be where you are to get where you need to go.” – Amy Poehler

Nine Wonky Log Cabins

 

When I was a music student, apples were a big part of my rehearsal schedule. I’d work ninety minutes daily alone in a practice room. The first thirty or so would be mindless (and mind-numbing) scales and arpeggios. I’d bring an apple and work with one hand while eating half the apple with the other. Then I’d switch hands. I ate the whole apple, except for the stem and the seeds, which I’d toss in a bin as I left. I’d read apple seeds contain cyanide, and didn’t fancy the idea of killing myself for my art. I needn’t have bothered. It turns out there’s so little cyanide in apple seeds, you’d have to eat bags of them to do any damage. Even then, the seed’s exocarp usually prevents it from being digested. All that time, I could have polished off the seeds as well. I wouldn’t have munched the stems, though. There’s such a thing as overkill.

Four Roosters

 

Herbes de Provence

 

1 tablespoon fennel seeds

2 tablespoons dried rosemary

1/4 cup dried thyme

3 tablespoons dried marjoram

3 tablespoons dried summer savory

1 tablespoon dried tarragon

1 tablespoon dried basil

1 teaspoon dried chervil

1 teaspoon dried mint

1 teaspoon dried lavender

 

Grind the fennel seeds and rosemary. Stir in remaining ingredients. Store in an airtight container away from sunlight for up to a year. Herbes de Provence can be used to season meats, chicken, fish, salads, vegetables, soups, and stews. I like to toss about a tablespoonful into a batch of roll dough before it rises.

Four Louisiana Blocks

 

“I remember my first winter here in Utah—snow everywhere. At first I enjoyed it, but after a few days I realized I had to get up earlier to remove snow from the driveway. One morning I was shoveling and saw my neighbor across the street. He’s older than I am. I thought if I finished soon, I could help him. I asked him, “Brother, do you need help?” He smiled and said, “Thank you, Elder Montoya.” He pulled a snowblower out of his garage, started the engine, and removed all the snow in front of his house. He then crossed the street with his machine and asked, “Elder, do you need help?” We are willing to help each other because we love each other. My brother’s needs become my needs, and mine become his. No matter what language my brother speaks or what country he comes from, we love each other because we are brothers, children of the same Father.” – Elder Hugo Montoya

Dark Rooster

 

Pork Adobo is a Filipino recipe. Traditionally, it marinates in overnight, to allow the flavors to blend. But several hours in a slow cooker should give a similar result.

 

Slow Cooker Pork Adobo

 

1 to 1 1/2-pound pork roast

8 cloves garlic, minced

1/4 cup apple cider vinegar

1/4 cup soy sauce

1/2 cup broth

1/2 teaspoon peppercorns, crushed (I use a cutting board and the flat side of my French chef’s knife.)

2 bay leaves

Pinch of dried oregano

 

Place pork in slow cooker. (If you wish, you can brown it in oil first.) Add remaining ingredients; cover and cook on low six to eight hours. Remove bay leaves. You can shred the pork before serving. If you prefer, you can cut the pork into cubes before cooking, which reduces the cook time to four or five hours. May be served over rice, with fried garlic and a fried egg.

Four Wonky Cabins

 

When Europeans began to settle in the New World, they brought apples with them – not to eat, but for cider. Fermented drinks were less likely to harbor dangerous microorganisms than water, and apples were easier to grow here than grapes or grain. Farmers cultivated a wide variety of apples, primarily to extend the growing and harvesting seasons. At one time, there were thousands of types of apples, with wildly different sizes, colors, textures and flavors. Today, if you’re lucky, you’ll find eight kinds of apple in your local grocery store. If you’re shopping for an apple tree, there are even fewer choices. One apple farmer is trying to change that. Tom Brown has made reclaiming lost heirloom apples his retirement hobby. So far, he’s ferreted out and restored 1,200 lost heirloom varieties, with names like Yellow Potts, Big Andy and Jellyflower. November 18 is Apple Cider Day:  a good day to honor Tom Brown and his work.

Light Rooster

 

If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

Remember: some days you’re the pigeon, and some days you’re the statue.

If you lend someone $20 and never see him again, it was probably worth it.

It may be your sole purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.

Never buy a car you can't push.

Don’t put both feet in your mouth at the same time. You won't have a leg to stand on.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.

Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.

A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

You can learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp and some are dull. They come in many different colors, but they all live in the same box.

Louisiana Variation

 

January 2020, Dan Hill popped into the gym for some late-night exercise. He swam laps, dried off, and got ready to head home. But while he was swimming, the employees turned off lights, locked up and went home. Dan was locked in the gym, alone. There was a certain irony to his predicament: though the gym had decided a few weeks earlier to close its doors from midnight to 4:00 a.m., the name of the establishment was “24-Hour Fitness.” Dan called Sandy police, worried he might be accused of breaking and entering. He called his wife, who suggested he find someplace to nap until the gym reopens. Finally, he took a selfie and posted it on Facebook. Within 18 minutes, Dan was a free man. The next few months brought hardship to a lot of businesses, particularly gyms. 24-Hour Fitness went bankrupt in June, 2020. The Sandy location is now a place to by home gym equipment. 

Four Patience Blocks

 

It was March, 2001, and we were exploring a brand-new Disney’s California Adventure Park. We’d just got off the Grizzly River Run, and Heather’s socks were soaked through. I popped into the gift shop to buy her a dry pair. There was an older fellow inside, manning the cash register and singing “I’ll Take You Home Again, Kathleen.” As I paid for the socks, I told him I wished I could take him home with me. We were staging Guys and Dolls in a few months, and were having a tough time finding the right actor to play Arvide. (Maybe in the 1950’s there were more elderly Irish tenors than you could shake a stick at. But in this century, they’re rather thin on the ground.) He handed me my change, winked and serenaded me with “More I Cannot Wish You” – Arvide’s solo. More proof, if we needed it, that it’s the cast members who make Disney magical.

Wonky Log Cabin

 

“There is a serious need for the charity that gives attention to those who are unnoticed, hope to those who are discouraged, aid to those who are afflicted. True charity is love in action. The need for charity is everywhere. Needed is the charity which refuses to find satisfaction in hearing or in repeating the reports of misfortunes that come to others, unless by so doing, the unfortunate one may be benefited. The American educator and politician Horace Mann once said, ‘To pity distress is but human; to relieve it is godlike.’ Charity is having patience with someone who has let us down. It is resisting the impulse to become offended easily. It is accepting weaknesses and shortcomings. It is accepting people as they truly are. It is looking beyond physical appearances to attributes that will not dim through time. It is resisting the impulse to categorize others.” – President Thomas S. Monson

Patience Block

 

Cheesy Bacon Omelet Cups

 

10 eggs

6 slices of bacon, cooked and crumbled

3/4 cup onion, diced

2 tablespoons butter, melted

2 tablespoons chives, minced (optional)

1/4 cup water

1 cup medium cheddar, shredded

Salt & pepper to taste

 

Preheat oven to 375F. Brush standard muffin tin with butter. Beat eggs in a large bowl until uniform; add remaining ingredients and mix well. Divide evenly among 12 muffin cups. Bake until centers are set. Serve warm. Any remaining omelet cups may be tightly sealed and stored in freezer.

A Couple of Carrots

 

Thirty-one-year-old New Yorker Quashon Burton is suspected of stealing at least four identities so he could receive almost $150,000 in government loans. The money was meant to help small businesses which were struggling because of the pandemic. Law enforcement officers went to his home to arrest him, but Burton was long gone. He was a fugitive for over a year. If you steal 150 grand, what are you gonna do next? Burton went to Walt Disney World. Friday, October 20, he visited Disney’s Animal Kingdom with members of his family, under a fake name. By the strangest coincidence, Jeff Andre – the agent who’d signed his arrest warrant – was also vacationing at the Animal Kingdom that day. He recognized the distinctive tattoo on Burton’s neck. I guess if you’re going to run afoul of the law, it’s not a great idea to put tattoos where everyone can see. And if you’re already wearing conspicuous ink, it’s best to keep your nose clean.

Abundant Blessings

 

This quilt started out as a boxed kit for a 65”x85” quilt with twenty 12” finished blocks. I found the Civil War prints and the Aunt Dinah block pictured on the top of the box especially attractive. Once I got it home and opened it up, I discovered there weren’t instructions for twenty different blocks inside. It was more like eight or nine, repeated. But I’m flexible. I made twenty different blocks, and then I made ten more. It’s 85”x96” now; big enough for a queen-sized bed. Because I didn’t want to spend extra time on a pieced border, I bought a couple of yards of fabric for this simple border. And, of course, I needed extra fabric for the quilt back. But other than that, everything you see here came in the box. I’ve even got enough of black leftover for the binding. And here’s the strangest thing: that box is still chock full of fabric.

Pinwheel Block

 

Amish Custard Pudding

 

1 (14 oz) can sweetened condensed milk

4 cups hot water

6 eggs

2 teaspoons vanilla

1/4 teaspoon salt

Ground nutmeg for garnish

 

Preheat oven to 325F. Combine milk and hot water in a large bowl. In a separate bowl beat eggs until light in color and fluffy in texture. Pour a bit of the hot milk mixture into eggs to temper, then combine them fully. Stir in vanilla and salt. Pour into ramekins (or use a 2-quart baking dish) and place on baking pan with high sides. Place pan in oven and fill pan with half inch of boiling water. Bake ramekins 1 hour or until a knife inserted in center comes out clean. If using larger baking dish bake for 1 hour 40 minutes. Allow custard to cool. Sprinkle with nutmeg and serve warm or refrigerate to serve chilled.

Chimney Sweep

 

“Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you're stupid and make bad decisions.” - Marion G. Harmon

“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.” - Alan Dundes

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.” - Albert Einstein

“If at first, you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.” - W.C. Fields

“It could be that your purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.” - Ashleigh Brilliant

“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.” – Drew Carey

“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.” - Margaret Mead

“The worst part of success is trying to find someone who is happy for you.” - Bette Midler

Star Puzzle

 

“Jesus Christ is both the purpose of our focus and the intent of our destination. To help us to remain fixed and heading in the right direction, the Savior invites us to see our lives through Him in order to see more of Him in our lives. I’ve come to learn more about this specific invitation through my study of the Old Testament. The law of Moses was given to the early Israelites as a preparatory gospel, designed to ready the people for a higher covenant relationship with God through Jesus Christ. The law, rich with symbolism pointing believers to look forward to the coming and Atonement of Jesus Christ, was meant to help the people of Israel focus on the Savior by practicing faith in Him, His sacrifice, and His laws and commandments in their lives—it was intended to bring them to a greater understanding of their Redeemer.” – Tracy Y. Browning

Ohio Star

 

It was first displayed in New York’s Museum of Modern Art in 1945, but it’s been hanging in Dusseldorf since 1980. It’s repeatedly called a painting, but it’s actually a white canvas with strips of adhesive tape in red, yellow and royal blue. It seems a stretch of the imagination to call it a work of art. It was constructed by Dutch artist Piet Mondrian in 1941; a bit of neoplasticism called “New York City 1.” The colorful strips are irregularly placed, some running horizontally and others vertically. There are slightly more strips near the bottom than the top, giving the illusion of darkness below. Recently, a curator discovered these horizontal strips belong at the top of the canvas. New York City 1 has been hanging upside-down three-quarters of a century. The gallery says it will continue to hang that way, as the glue backing the adhesive strips is fragile. Flipping it right-side up would be its undoing.

Duck and Ducklings

 

I’m not a huge fan of spicy food, but I do like lots of flavor. If I’m eating curry, pad Thai, piri-piri, Korean barbecue or enchiladas and my nose isn’t running, something’s gone wrong. I chose medium chilies for this recipe. You’re free to choose whatever level of heat suits you.

 

Green Chili Mac and Cheese

 

8 ounces elbow macaroni

2 tablespoons butter

2 tablespoons flour

2 cups milk

8 ounces Monterey Jack, shredded

2 4-ounce cans diced green chiles (mild, medium or hot), drained

1/2 teaspoon ground cumin

1/8 teaspoon red pepper flakes

 

Cook macaroni according to package directions; drain. While pasta cooks, melt butter in saucepot. Add flour and cook over medium heat, stirring, about 2 minutes. Whisk in milk. Continue to cook and stir until mixture begins to simmer. Remove from heat and stir in the cheese. Add remaining ingredients to sauce. Combine cooked and drained pasta with sauce; serve hot.

Arbor Windows

 

Percy Spencer carried peanut clusters in his pocket, primarily to share with chipmunks. One day Percy found the cluster he’d pocketed had melted – something unlikely to be caused by a warm day or even his own body heat. Percy was an employee of Raytheon, one of the country’s leading producers of magnetrons. He wondered if the energy that ruined his snack had come from an active magnetron. He experimented with a raw egg, which exploded and left him literally with egg on his face. Next came a bowl of un-popped popcorn. Sure enough, the corn popped when placed near a working magnetron. Percy’s discovery led to the invention of the microwave oven. Today, it's hard to imagine a kitchen without one. Percy Spencer was a clever fellow. But I think if I’d found something powerful enough to melt peanut clusters, pop corn and blow up eggs, my first thought would be how to prevent it from cooking me. 

Vintage Stars

 

Three-quarters of this fabric came from a Lori Holt “Baked with Love” quilt kit. The other twenty-five percent is scraps from a Lori Holt Prim fat quarter bundle and a Lori Holt Mad for Plaid jelly roll. The design is completely my own, and it’s the product of serendipity. I knew I wanted to make a log cabin quilt. It’s usually the direction I steer when I have lots of long, skinny strips to use up. I wanted to incorporate sawtooth stars as well. Initially, I stuck stars inside the log cabins, but didn’t like the result. I moved the stars to the cornerstones BETWEEN the log cabins, and everything seemed to fall into place. In a day or two, this top will go to Stitching Hearts Worldwide, where some generous and talented person(s) will quilt and bind it, and it will go to a refugee or homeless person. I hope they love it as much as I do.

Churn Dash

 

Caswell-Massey was an apothecary shop in Newport, Rhode Island in the early 1750’s – the first personal care product company in the New World. It was founded by Dr. William Hunter, a Scottish anatomist and surgeon. In addition to medicinal essential oils, Dr. Hunter concocted and sold hygiene products and cosmetics. Dr. Hunter’s Castille soap kept Lewis and Clark clean during their 1803-1806 expedition. Hunter twenty distinctly different colognes, giving each his name and a sequential number. “Dr. Hunter's Cologne Number Six” was a personal favorite of George Washington’s. Our first president sent a bottle to the French aristocrat Marquis de Lafayette, in gratitude for his enormous help during the American Revolutionary War. Caswell-Massey is still in business today; its headquarters still in Newport, Rhode Island. Dr. Hunter's Cologne Number Six is still in production, and has been worn by John Quincy Adams, John F. Kennedy, George Gershwin, John Denver, and countless others.