Half a Dozen Barrel Cacti

 

“There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.” – Erma Bombeck

“Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” – Victor Borge

“Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh since there is less cleaning up to do afterward.” – Kurt Vonnegut

“If we couldn’t laugh, we would all go insane.” – Robert Frost

“There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humor.” – Charles Dickens

“Laughter is an instant vacation.” – Milton Berle

“The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.” – Mark Twain

“A person who knows how to laugh at himself will never cease to be amused.” – Shirley MacClain

“With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come.” – William Shakespeare

“You cannot be mad at somebody who makes you laugh – it’s as simple as that.” – Jay Leno

Forty-Two Butterflies

 

“Moroni knew firsthand about having hope in Christ during tribulation. He explained his harrowing situation: ‘I am alone. I have not whither to go.’ ‘I make not myself known lest they should destroy me.’ Remarkably, in this dark and lonely hour, Moroni records his father’s words of hope: ‘If a man have faith he must needs have hope; for without faith there cannot be any hope.’ ‘Ye shall have hope through the atonement of Christ and the power of his resurrection, to be raised unto life eternal.’ Hope is a living gift, a gift that grows as we increase our faith in Jesus Christ. Faith is the substance of things hoped for. We build this substance—the evidence blocks of our faith—through prayer, temple covenants, keeping the commandments, continually feasting on the scriptures and the words of modern-day prophets, taking the sacrament, serving others, and worshipping weekly with our fellow Saints.” – Elder Neil L. Andersen

Frosty

 

The word quesadilla means, “little thing made with cheese.” So, if you decide to omit the cheddar, you should probably call it something else.

 

Apple Pie Quesadillas

 

4 large flour tortillas

2 apples, thinly sliced

1 teaspoon cinnamon

2 tablespoons sugar

4 tablespoons unsalted butter

1/2 cup medium cheddar cheese, shredded

 

In a bowl, toss apple slices with cinnamon and sugar. Heat a skillet over medium heat and melt one tablespoon of butter. Place a tortilla in the skillet, add a layer of apple slices and sprinkle with cheese. Top with another tortilla and cook until golden brown, then flip to cook the other side. Repeat with remaining ingredients. Cut into wedges and serve warm. Wonderful with custard, cream, whipped cream, or vanilla ice cream.

Corner Canyon Pines

 

Early in 2022, our guild started work on this quilt. “Suburbs Tree Block” from Cluck Cluck Sew couldn’t have been simpler. It’s a grey isosceles triangle between two white tone-on-tone right triangles, above a black square and two white rectangles. Each month we made several matching tree blocks, then swapped them so we’d each end up with a scrappy quilt. Extra blocks went into a group project to be hand quilted and donated to the IHC Holiday Quilt Show and Auction. I didn’t help with the hand quilting, and the six red trees weren’t my idea (though I wish I’d thought of them). But I did contribute several grey trees. This lovely quilt was auctioned off with dozens of others last week to fund a new ultrasound imaging machine for the Grant Scott Bonham Fetal Center at Intermountain Primary Children’s Hospital. I’m happy to take a little of the credit. Now if I can just finish my own tree quilt.

Tiny Teal Heart

 

Our cat Toodles has lived with us just over twelve years. She isn’t as playful as a kitten, but she doesn’t seem old. Domestic cats have an average lifespan of thirteen to twenty years. Female cats tend to live a bit longer (just like humans), primarily because males are more likely to engage in risky behavior (also like humans). Cats can jump up to six times their body length. That’s like you or me jumping thirty+ feet! If you only know cats from cartoons, you’d assume they live on milk. While they’re attracted by the smell, and they’ll drink milk you’ve left out, adult cats are lactose intolerant. Cats may be the only mammals who can’t taste sweet. So, cat food should never have a sweetener added. Last spring, we were invaded by a teeming throng of sugar ants. They were so thick in the dog food we had to toss it all. But they didn’t touch the cat food.

Two Blue Houses

 

We tried this recipe last Wednesday. If I were to change anything, I’d have used cubed butternut, and I’d have cut the carrots into smaller chunks. It wouldn’t have hurt to roast the veg a bit longer, either. But it did make my whole house smell wonderful!

 

Roasted Autumn Vegetable Soup

 

1 large or 2 small butternut squashes, halved and seeded

A handful of carrots, peeled

2 to 3 small sweet potatoes

1 large onion, peeled and quartered

1 to 2 large, ripe tomatoes, halved

A few cloves of garlic, peeled

1 bell pepper, halved and seeded

32 ounces vegetable or chicken broth

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon fresh grated nutmeg

Salt and pepper to taste

A cup or two of heavy cream

 

 

Brush sheet cake pan with olive oil and spread vegetables on it. Brush vegetable tops with oil. Roast about an hour at 375F. Scoop squash flesh into Dutch oven or stock pot. Add remaining vegetables and broth. Cook on low for about an hour. Blend with stand mixture until desired consistency. Add cinnamon, nutmeg, salt and pepper. Stir in cream. Serve warm with crusty bread.

Three Aloes

 

March 13, 1781, William Herschel made note of an object in the nighttime sky. He was in his garden, using a homemade 6.2” telescope. He reported the object was a comet, although it had no tail. After several weeks of watching his “comet,” William determined the object must be a planet. In recognition of this momentous discovery, King George III offered a stipend of £200 (roughly £30,000 in today’s money) as long as William moved to Windsor so the royal family could enjoy using his telescopes. As the planet’s finder, William was tasked with choosing a name. He settled on “Georgium Sidus” or “Planet George” to honor his new patron. The name was more popular in England than elsewhere. It was argued the other planets – named for Roman gods – sounded more dignified. Eventually Planet George was renamed for the Greek god of the sky: Ouranos. I guess Uranus is more distinguished. But George is easier to spell. And pronounce.

Forty-One Butterflies

“Burying our weapons of rebellion against God simply means yielding to the enticing of the Holy Spirit, putting off the natural man, and becoming a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord. It means putting the first commandment first in our lives. It means letting God prevail. If our love of God and our determination to serve Him with all our might, mind, and strength become the touchstone by which we judge all things and make all our decisions, we will have buried our weapons of rebellion. By the grace of Christ, God will forgive our sins and rebellions of the past and will take away the stain of those sins and rebellions from our hearts. Our Heavenly Father and His Son, our Redeemer, have confirmed Their unending commitment to our ultimate happiness through the most profound love and sacrifice. We experience Their love daily. Surely we can reciprocate with our own love and loyalty.” – Elder D. Todd Christofferson

 

Three Star Puzzles

 

Michel Vaujour was a notorious bank robber who’d been incarcerated several times. In 1986, he was serving time in the high-security section of Paris’ Santé Prison. Michel’s wife Nadine was left to fend for herself. Another woman might have filed for divorce, applied for a job, or moved back in with mom and dad. Nadine took flying lessons. Under an assumed name, she learned to pilot a helicopter. Once she’d mastered this unusual skill, Nadine rented a chopper from a local airfield and headed to Santé Prison. There, she expertly hovered above the prison yard while Michel, armed with a realistic-looking toy gun, climbed a rope ladder to join her. The helicopter whisked them away over the Paris skyline. If this were an action movie, the end credits might have appeared at this point. But Michel and Nadine were captured only four months later. They both served jail time. Today, they’re free and living quietly under the radar. We hope.

Raspberry Cheesecake

 

“My kid hasn’t finished her homework but she did call a family meeting to show us the 20-slide presentation she created on why we should get a cat.”

“My husband accepted an invite to a BBQ for us and said we would bring a salad, like ‘we’ has anything to do with it.”

“My teen complained about my cooking, so I stopped fighting it and filled the freezer with frozen dinners instead of making dinner. After a week of frozen dinners, guess who’s asking me to cook again.”

“My kid cleaned the kitchen without being asked, and now we wait to see what she wants.”

“Sorry I’m late. I believed the washing machine when it said it only had one minute left in the cycle.”

“My teen is using chopsticks to eat Cheetos so she doesn’t get Cheeto dust on her fingers and can we just fast track her application to Yale now?” – Krista Pacion

Star Puzzle

 

This week I learned about Loose Ends, a non-profit that pairs unfinished textile projects with skilled volunteer artisans. Say you have a grandma who just passed, leaving a quilt or sweater or tapestry she started but never had the chance to finish. It’s an heirloom, surely, one she meant for you to cherish. But you never learned the necessary skills to complete it. That’s where Loose Ends comes in. You tell them about your unfinished project. (They’ve specifically asked not to send projects directly to Loose Ends, but they do accept cash donations.) They then match you up with a nearby textile artist who will gladly finish it for you. To date, Loose Ends has more than 28,000 volunteer finishers in 64 countries. Hand-made items are an expression of love. When a maker passes mid-project, the unfinished item is often sadly lost or discarded. Volunteer finishing feels like such a beautiful way to comfort someone who is grieving. 

Red House

 

Ida Holdgreve was born in Delphos, Ohio in 1881. In 1910, Ida moved to Dayton and began looking for work. She saw an ad in the paper that read, "Plain Sewing Wanted". Plain sewing was a common term a hundred years ago. It referred to fundamental skills, such as those that would be needed to repair clothing or household linens. Ida was an excellent seamstress, so she answered the ad. But the newspaper had messed up. The ad was supposed to say, "Plane Sewing Wanted" for Orville and Wilbur Wright. Ida became head seamstress at the Wright Brothers Airplane Factory, sewing covers for fuselages, wings and rudders. The fabric she stitched had to fit the frame exactly, stretched tightly so it wouldn’t rip in the wind. When there were accidents, Ida was required to help with the repairs. Despite her work with airplanes Ida did not take her first airplane ride until 1969 at age of eight-eight.

Two Prickly Pears

 

The age-old riddle (139 years old) is, “Who’s buried in Grant’s tomb?” The obvious answer is, of course, Ulysses S. Grant. The correct answer is nobody. Grant and his wife Julie are laid to rest in the mausoleum, but as neither sarcophagus is underground, no one’s buried there. Ulysses S. Grant was born Hiram Ulysses Grant in 1822. When he applied to attend the United States Military Academy at West Point in 1839, a clerical error changed his name Ulysses S. (Grant said he’d actually intended to change his name to Ulysses Hiram Grant, to avoid the initials H.U.G.) So, President Grant’s middle initial S doesn’t stand for anything at all. He’s not the only U.S. president with this odd condition. When Harry S. Truman was born, half the family hoped he’d be named Solomon for his maternal grandfather. The other half wanted Shipp for his paternal grandfather. Truman’s S is there to keep the peace.

Forty Butterflies

 

“Our mortal experience could be compared to a cruise ship on which God has sent all His children as they journey from one shore to another. The voyage is filled with opportunities to learn, grow, be happy, and progress, but it is also full of dangers. God loves all His children and is concerned about their welfare. He does not want to lose any of them, so He invites those who are willing to become members of His crew—that’s you. Because of your choice to make and keep covenants, He offers you His trust. He trusts you to be different, peculiar, and set apart because of the important work He trusts you to do. Think of it! God trusts you—of all the people on the earth, the children of the covenant, His crew members—to help with His work of bringing all His children safely home to Him.” – Bradley R. Wilcox

Three Pinwheels

 

The third largest city in California by land area (behind San Diego and Los Angeles) is a place you’ve probably never heard of. California City was formed in 1958, when developers bought 82,000 acres of the Mojave Desert and pitched it as a planned community: a smarter alternative to piece-meal built cities. The city was originally designed to accommodate 400,000 people. There would be a central park with a manmade lake, two golf courses, and a brand-new Holiday Inn. Every detail was planned, right down to the types of trees in public parks and along city streets. In spite of aggressive promotion campaigns, California City was slow to start. In 1971, Ralph Nader called it “a fraud and a study of government failure.” As of 2018, California City had only 14,000 residents. Most of them are clustered in the city’s west end, surrounded by acres of streets and neighborhoods that were laid out but never built.

Contrary Wife

 

Have you ever been bold in your own kitchen? Have you ever:

Made soup without a can or mix?

Zested an orange or lemon?

Tried homemade sausage?

Baked bread, cake, pie or cookies from scratch?

Poached salmon or fried a catfish?

Cooked a mess of greens?

Made an icebox cake or refrigerator pickles?

Done homemade jam or jelly?

Thrown (or rolled) your own pizza dough and added your favorite toppings?

Roasted a whole turkey?

Made macaroni and cheese without the box?

If the answer to any of these is no, today might be the perfect day to change that. November 8 is Cook Something Bold Day – the day set aside to actually use the recipe or try the cooking technique you’ve been thinking about for ages. Do some research first, gather ingredients, and maybe watch a few YouTube how-to videos. Clear and wipe your workspace (most kitchen mishaps occur on cluttered countertops) and get to it. Good luck!

Tiny Blue Pinwheel

 

Like most four-year-olds, Gabi Mann was a messy eater. She dropped food wherever she went. The crows in her Seattle neighborhood noticed and took full advantage of the situation. Eventually, Gabi’s mom, worried too much of her daughter’s lunch was going to the birds, started deliberately leaving treats out for the crows. That’s when the gifts started showing up. Grateful crows left beads, foil and bits of jewelry for Gabi and her mom. One day, Mrs. Mann, an avid photographer, lost a lens cap while out taking pictures. Later that day, a crow returned the missing lens cap. Some four years later, two of the Manns’ neighbors sued them for $200,000, claiming the birds were a nuisance. The Manns paid an undisclosed amount and promised to limit the bird feeding for eight years – the average crow lifetime. Great, except crows are known to teach their children (and grand-children) about humans they like and dislike. 

Stewed Tomatoes

 

John and I have been married almost 46 years. Every summer we’ve tried to grow something we could eat. Our first garden was a potato patch outside our basement apartment window; a colossal failure, but we learned a lot. We’ve grown veg and herbs in patio pots when we didn’t have any actual soil of our own. Space was always our biggest concern. Not this year. Half of this year’s garden was sweet corn. We had a wonderful crop, but it was all ripe the very same week. We planted a few more tomatoes than necessary, and were quickly overrun with cherry toms. The Japanese eggplant and zucchini were awesome: not too much or too little. This year’s peppers were the biggest, most beautiful ever. But our sorry pumpkin plants produced nothing but spindly vines. Next year, we plan to plant corn in phases, do fewer cherry tomatoes, and maybe pray over the pumpkins.

Four Big Red Hearts

 

“Voting in government elections and performing other civic duties when we have the opportunity is a sacred responsibility, a God-given blessing, and a duty to be carried out with honor and trust. I have a testimony of the importance of being subject to kings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates, in obeying, honoring, and sustaining the law. Because we’re subject to rulers, we must do all we can in diplomatic, legal, and supportive ways to select and help elect officials who are honest, wise, and good. We should also consider running for office ourselves. I’m always pleased when a First Presidency letter is read in sacrament meeting just before each election encouraging Latter-day Saints to be involved in the election process and to choose able and honest political and governmental leaders. The First Presidency reminds us ‘as citizens we have the privilege and duty of electing office holders and influencing public policy.’” – Michael A. Neider, October 2012

Thirty-Nine Butterflies

 

“We’re grateful for the noticeable increase in those who respond to sacred invitations, change their lives, and accept the opportunity to follow Jesus Christ. They enter the covenant path through faith, repentance, baptism, and confirmation as taught in the Holy Bible and the Book of Mormon. We cannot underestimate the significance of sacred scriptures both in conversions and in remaining faithful in the gospel. The ancient prophets described in the Book of Mormon knew about the mission of Jesus Christ and taught His gospel. The Book of Mormon helps us draw closer to God as we learn, understand, and apply its teachings. To know the Book of Mormon is the word of God, we need to read, ponder, and pray about it and act according to its precepts. The prophet Moroni promised God will reveal the truth of the book to us as we pray with a sincere heart. Studying the Book of Mormon is essential for enduring conversion.” – Elder Quentin L. Cook

Christmas Eve

 

Blanca Tague and her husband, a cross-country trucking couple, were at a truck stop in Laredo, Texas in 2017. They noticed a scrawny grey tabby begging truckers for food. He was too scared to let anyone near him, but when Blanca’s husband offered him a piece of chicken, he was able to grab him before he could run off. The Tagues realized they couldn’t just leave him in the truck stop parking lot, so they brought the cat onboard. They intended to help him gain weight, and then find him a forever home. They didn’t count on falling in love with him. They ended up naming the cat Grayson. It’s been seven years now. Grayson and the Tagues have been to every state in the U.S. except Alaska and Hawaii. “He’s my world,” says Blanca. “I’m so glad we were able to help him; he’s been at my side along the road and on all our journeys together.’

Nosegay

 

The Nazis called it Ostwall (East Wall) or Festungsfront Oder-Warthe-Bogen (fortified front between Oder and Wartha) and the locals called it Regenwurmlager (earthworm camp). It was an elaborate series of bunkers and interconnected tunnels intended to defend Germany from invasion by Russia or Poland. Construction started in 1932 in what used to be eastern Germany (it’s western Poland now). It was intended to be finished in 1951. When Hitler himself visited the construction site in 1935, the system of tunnels was already twenty miles long and 130 feet deep. The modern-day equivalent of $100 million was spent building the system, which included railway stations, workshops, engine rooms and barracks. But Ostwall saw little to no actual wartime use. Today, parts of the fortifications are open to visitors. But most of Ostwall has become the world’s largest man-made bat preserve, housing some 37,000 flying mammals.