Goose in the Pond

 

In 1889 a British magazine offered prizes to single ladies who sent in the best answers to the question “Why am I a spinster?” Twenty-one answers were published, and each author was awarded five shillings. Here are a few of their replies:

“Because I am an English woman and Americans monopolize the market.”

“Because I do not want another pet, and I think that man is a less docile animal than a dog, less affectionate than a cat, and less entertaining than a monkey.”

“Because men, like some pies, are deceptive: they appear pleasing to the eye, but on closer acquaintance they prove to be empty and stale.”

“As a wild horse roams free upon the prairies, scorning the lasso that would make him a prisoner, so I find it more pleasant to walk on the border between freedom and captivity, than to be caught by the marriage lasso.”