Eye of the Beholder

 Potatoes are treated with pesticides and fungicides during the growing season. They’re sprayed with herbicides to kill off the vines before harvesting and after to keep them from sprouting. Since root vegetables are absorbent, washing can’t make them safe. You could buy organic potatoes (they're not all that expensive), you could grow your own, or you could just switch to a healthier vegetable:

Mock Mashed Potatoes

1 large head of cauliflower

1 tablespoon cream cheese

1/4 cup grated Parmesan

1/2 teaspoon minced garlic

1/4 teaspoon chicken bouillon granules

Dash fresh ground black pepper

1/2 teaspoon chives

3 tablespoons unsalted butter

Cut cauliflower into small pieces. Steam above boiling water about 6 minutes or until soft. Drain well and pat dry with paper towels. While still hot, puree in a bowl with an immersion blender. Blend in cheeses, garlic, bouillon, and pepper until almost smooth. Don’t overdo it! You’ll end up with paste! Serve with chives and butter.